Ice breaker - Runnin’ against the wind / A bottle of fine wine

It was Clark Powell, who once said “Life is full of opening doors in to wonderful new rooms. But nothing comes for free, not the keys to the doors, not even the wonderful new rooms".

Mr./Madam Toastmaster, Ladies and Gentlemen,

In the wee hours of May 30^th, 1981, I opened my first door and emerged naked in to this world. I was the first child to my parents before my three younger brothers. Since then, I have opened many doors, but none of the keys were served on a silver platter. My life has forever been a steep climb, against the wind, BUT as difficult a climb it might have been, the run down the backside of the mountain is always refreshing. This speech, where I have a chance to tell you’ll a little bit about who I am, is like a run down that mountain.

As a kid, I was very close to my father. I would count the seconds to see him after work and get him to read me the same story book over and over again. After he left the country to Oman, in search of a few extra cents, I missed him so much that I became sick. Doctors advised my mother to admit me in to the kindergarten a year earlier so that once I mix up with other kids; I’d stop missing him as much.

Fast forward a few years, I experienced a loss that I still fail to comprehend. I will never be able to put it in to words so I’m not going to talk about it.

Fast forward a couple of years further, I was sitting in a jet plane with my mother, happy as ever since I would be seeing my father, and a little nervous since I was being jettisoned to a strange land where I neither spoke the language nor knew the customs. I will remember that plane ride for another special reason. Fleet manager of Air Lanka, then Sri Lankan Airlines, spotted me and requested my mother for permission to cast me in the Official Air Lanka commercial. And yes, If you remember the advert, I was the kid who was shown drawing on a drawing pad in the comfort of a first class seat with the help of a Model air hostess by my side. While in Oman, I attended an International school; Sri Lankan School Muscat to be specific. My limited English proficiency at the time made it a little tough at the start, both to understand lessons and also communicate with the kids of other nationalities, but I learned fast. Soon I managed to make a couple of best friends, some of whom are still present in my life today.

I schooled in Oman till my London O/Ls after which I was sent back to Sri Lanka to pursue my A/L studies due to a deficiency of good teaching staff for A/L classes. Leaving Sri Lankan school was one of the saddest moments in my life. It was beyond doubt the best school I ever attended. I will cherish some of the memories I mustered eternally. I’m not going to blurt out any of them here; I’d leave that for another speech.

I took up science as my stream for secondary studies since I always wanted to be a doctor. I managed to get through my A/Ls with sufficient results to make it to a British medical college. But what am I doing here at IFS then? Yes, I let the opportunity pass. Medical colleges in the United Kingdom were way too expensive and my father would have had to spend all that he earned and more. I never forget to stop and think how anything I do would affect my family. I never wanted to lay such a huge burden on my beloved parents. Therefore, I decided to leave that 'door' closed and pursue an Information Systems degree offered by the Manchester Metropolitan University, UK. The four years I spent there could not be summarized in a two hour speech. I made many friends and foes. Some of the friends have become integral elements of my life and consider them my brothers from a different mother. I had to work really hard on my studies. Spent many sleepless nights and months of hard work. And finally in 2004, I graduated with a First Class Honors. I was over the moon, since I never wanted to settle for anything less. I started working here at IFS immediately afterwards. I also worked as a visiting lecturer at Informatics Institute of Technology and also completed a Masters in Advanced Software Engineering in 2007, in which I attained the highest accolade granted; a masters with a distinction.

Everything I have gone through and achieved thus far was never as easy as an evening walk in the park. Not even close. I have had my share of luck working for me in many a times. But it’s mostly a result of the hard work and dedication. Most things fail to grab my interest, but if it does, the compulsion to work on it beyond expectations with a blend of my authenticity, has always brought me to the top. Love also had a huge toll in shaping my life. There were those crazy days in the past when little castles were built in air that eventually got blown away with the wind. There was a time, when I was lost in the ashes of the glory times, but now, I’m living without any regression, in the afterglow. They were like northern stars that led me in to the loving arms of my princess, who is crafting the most beautiful episode of my life. She is the closest thing to crazy and might not resemble the 'coke bottle', but I love her in many ways that I never deemed possible. I try and spend the maximum time with my beloved parents and brothers. For they, are the unsung heroes of my success story. I try to not let work override my life. Because first is only a part of the second. As John Lennon would say, "Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans".

In short, I’m happy. I have no serious expectations in life and I take things as they come. I’m successful in my own terms. Because if your success is not on your own terms, even if it looks good to the world but does not feel good in your heart, it’s not success at all. Remember the words of Lily Tomlin, "If you win the rat race, you are still a rat".

The person that stands before you is like a bottle of fine wine, brewed out of the past experiences and seasoned with the lifetime of memories. As a person, I may seem as proud as a Lion in his Lair, but what lies within is a humble heart, wanting to befriend you and be there for you and support you in every possible way. Part of which is the ability to speak up, speak out and reach out. This is the reason I have joined Toastmasters; like others have done for me, here I am learning to reach out, to help others.

Sanath Jayasuriya, a spent shell?

Sanath Jayasuriya, my favourite cricketer, every bowler's favourite victim, what an icon he has been for Sri Lankan cricket, if not for the International game of cricket overall. He revolutionized the one day game to what it is today and has broken/created multitude of records, most we aren't even aware of. He's a humble man from the southern tip of Sri Lanka with an undying passion for the game and despite all the fame, glory and respect he has earned from fellow crickets and fans all over the world, he still remains to be so. His mere presence in team makes a world of difference and one wonders (damn...that sounded like Ranjith Fernando), let me rephrase that: I wonder how the Sri Lankan cricketing fans would bear when he departs from the game for good.

Ok ok...enough of the ado. This post is not a history roll out on Sanath and his achievements in the game. I just wanted to share with you all a thought that came upon me following the Bangladesh series that ended yesterday. Sanath Scored a little over 50 runs in the series but bagged 9 wickets, which eventually won him the Man of the Series award. Sanath started as a left arm spinner in the early 90s before he earned the title of being the official Master Blaster in the game on his way to becoming the batsman legend that he is today. But taking his performance during the last series in to consideration, is he going back to being just a bowler who can bat, like when he started his career? has he lost the 'mojo' for destruction? Is he a spent shell? OR am I thinking like a typical Sri Lankan? Well, I think its the latter :)

We Sri Lankans, not all, but most, tend to degrade a person simple by focusing on the present. He didnt score that many runs and did not display a fluent picture of batting, but hey, he made sure he contributed with wickets. Thats the buoyancy of the man. He's a battleship with all kinds of armour. A selfless cricketer who would sacrifice everything to earn a victory for the country. Why is he the Greatest All-rounder the gentlemen's game has ever produced? I think I know, I know you do too. Sanath, you have always been one of the greatest ambassadors to represent this glorious nation, your job is not over, may it never ever be!

Wild Life in Sri Lanka

I just wanted to share with you'll the remarkable beauty of Wild Life in Sri Lanka which I more than assure you of being among the best in the world!

I have traveled to 6 of the many gifted Jungles and National parks in Sri Lanka and words fail me when trying to put the experience in to sentences! Because its simply breath-taking! The scenic beauty is unbelievable and life is so free of trouble and pressure...and thats when you seriously tend to wonder if the effort you put in studying your 'asses' out, trying to earn that extra bit of cash to make each day a little better, let alone the money you spend on them, is actually worth it...

I encourage you to explore these jungles atleast once, because I know none of you all will regret it....I personally think each and every Sri Lankan should get involved in preserving these natural resources gifted to this wonderful country...Please do your part, because I'm doing mine...and others...please do visit and experience the difference!

The picture of the Elephant you see, was taken on our expedition to Udawalawe National Park....

http://www.srilankatourism.org/lure_jungles.htm

http://www.asia-planet.net/srilanka/nationalpark.htm

Don’t Be a Powerless Leader

By Don Blohowiak

We lead most effectively when we aren’t trying to be a leader.

— Precisely. —

In our over-marketed society, any intentional attempt to lead comes across as a sales message and thus, especially among young people, triggers skepticism and defenses.

In something of an irony, it’s your casual, unguarded language, the phrases you use in everyday speech, that tend to influence others much better than your carefully constructed management memos, speeches, or pronouncements. And just as importantly, your unvarnished utterances also betray your true orientation to the world and signal your worthiness as a leader.

How familiar do these phrases ring?

Well, what can you do?

Nobody asked me.

I didn’t make the decision.

If that’s what they want, I guess that’s what we’ll have to deliver.

Such statements are the speech of an impotent management mindset. And it’s poison in the well of your leadership credibility.

When your colleagues hear declarations of organizational impotence like these coming out of you, they conclude: You see yourself as powerless. You are yielding — giving away — control and influence to others. You don’t have the moxie, the courage, to take a stand, to challenge convention, to do what leaders do.

This isn’t, of course, to suggest that you ought see yourself as omnipotent — you’re not and shouldn’t try to be. Nor is it to say that you can’t ever allow that you lost a political battle, or even share with your team that you see a decision differently from the ultimate decision-maker or influential dissenters.

The difference between using the weak language profiled above and taking a contrary stand from a position of strength is in the confidence you feel (and exude) about you and your place in your situation.

A leader who uses weak language believes him|herself to be be weak and most of us know that. So we wisely don’t align ourselves with leaders who — even if they can’t see it — send clear signals that they consider themselves to be weak and unworthy of our full confidence.

In many surveys and studies, people indicate that honesty and credibility are the leadership qualities they find most essential in the people they willingly follow. What is more essential to exuding honesty and credibility than having genuine faith in yourself?

If you sense that you don’t have the confidence of the people you are supposed to lead, you need to understand why that is. In my coaching work with leaders, we often find that it is because the led correctly perceive something the manager has not admitted to himself: That he is missing a feeling of power or competence to affect outcomes on the job — ingredients essential to effective leadership.

Fortunately, with a little work on some underlying distortions in self-perceptions a competent manager can (re)discover his or her capabilities and strengthen latent leadership capability.

To lead others, you must first fully believe in you before asking others to believe in you. Because real leaders have people believing in them even when they aren’t asking them to.

Most managers die with their mouths open

by John McKee

"Great leaders ask lots of questions. They’ve figured out that their success depends on it"

For a while it seemed that this was widely accepted; however lately I seem to be running into more execs who are concerned they will look dumb if they let their subordinates, peers or bosses see that they don’t know “everything”. They tell me that they may lose some amount of power if others realize they aren’t all-knowing about everything. This is unfortunate. Their actions will actually speed up their demise.

The evidence on this issue is very clear: the best leaders recognize that asking questions - all the time - is the single best way to keep in touch with what they most need to know. Great managers ask customers if they have any ideas to improve service levels or products; they ask subordinates for ideas to make the company more efficient; and they ask competitors what they do that is great. The best leaders know that they can never know everything.

They also recognize that asking someone for their ideas makes that person more likely to take their direction. We work harder for a boss we think cares about us and our opinions.

After 30 years as a former leader of billion dollar organizations and executive coach, I’ve had the chance to see many companies from the inside and out. I am convinced that the majority of North American businesses are filled with employees who are cranky about never having an opportunity to provide ideas to senior management. Because of that, they are performing at fairly low levels. They’ve concluded that nobody values their contributions anyway. So why work hard?

When you’re at the top of a department or organization or company, it’s easy to start to believe that you have a certain something which most others don’t. This can lead to the mistaken opinion that others can’t give you new ideas or tactics not already considered. You may start to believe that you have a very unique ability to see things from all sides without anyone else’s help. Worse, your ego may start taking over. At that point, the only times anyone hears from you are when you are telling them your opinions. Don’t think it can happen? Watch for this in the actions of others in your organization - there will be many “tellers” but only a few ”listeners”.

This happens to people at all ages. Ken Lay, former Chairman of Enron was a known “teller”. And when one of his accounting VP’s tried to alert him to impending disaster, he regarded her advice as being incorrect and not worthy of follow-up. Carly Fiorina, formerly of HP, grew into a “teller” although she was once considered an excellent listener. In her case, even when all the trade magazines were announcing her imminent departure; she disregarded what was being said because she thought she was invaluable. They died (career wise) with their mouths open.

On the other hand, people like the founder of Amazon, Jeff Bozos, and the founder of DIRECTV, Eddy Hartenstein, were famous for asking everyone for their thoughts and opinions. Bozos is still there despite many forecasts that he’d fail. Hartenstein retired while still very successful as Rupert Murdoch bought that company.

So - listen up! And be a better executive.

And don’t just take my word for this. (As a matter of fact, never take any coach’s or consultant’s word without checking it out further…) Monitor those who you consider to be great leaders in action. Then take your lead from them